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Electronic Arts Announces Latest SIMS Game Will Feature American Elected Representatives

Fired-the-Shot-Heard-Round-the-World-Amber-FergusonWASHINGTON, D.C. (DDP) – Popular Video Game Publisher Electronic Arts (EA) has announced a new edition of its popular Sims franchise, this one featuring American Congressional representatives. It’s title, “The SIMS US Version: Taxation With Representation?,” has already been criticized by some members of Congress.

The Sims is part of the “god game” genre in the video gaming industry. Players design and control virtually every aspect of the playable characters’ worlds, from their clothing, to their housing, to their actual personalities and behavior.

The fictional characters react with each other and their environments naturally, subject to the player’s desired level of interference. For example, within the game’s fictional Washington, the characters can schedule Caribbean vacations, spa treatments, private catered parties, or even terminate an employee in order to hire a more attractive one, just as in “real” life.

In this latest version of the game, a player is given the choice to allow the Congressional characters to vote as they would in the actual world, or to intervene in the fictional world and cause Congress to vote in ways the player best sees fit.

Although EA has announced it will not release the game until November, preorder estimates now exceed a hundred million. An anonymous spokesperson for Electronic Arts told the Depressed in an exclusive telephone interview that people who wanted to go back in time and replay the Obamacare vote had placed approximately 85 percent of the preorders.

The game comes with a new “voice recognition” feature, which players may upload onto their existing gaming devices. Once the upgrade is installed, players may pontificate for as long as they desire. Online play includes the option to filibuster.

In an exclusive telephone interview with the Depressed, an anonymous spokesperson for EA admitted that the game’s lead developers had originally intended to include a brief tutorial to introduce the original Constitution; however, after beta testers indicated that the American public wasn’t really interested, the developers omitted all references to historical facts.

He said, “The original Founding Fathers had some kind of weird mistrust of government. When you really get into the Bill of Rights, it’s almost like it was written to protect the people from federal control.

“Meanwhile, although gamers tend to be geeky but intelligent public school kids, our beta testers complained that they were having particular trouble understanding Amendment IV. By the time the tutorial got to Amendment X, several of the students complained it was so incomprehensible that they quit in frustration.

“And they kept asking us why the amendment that protects the government from religion was.”

The Depressed has since learned that a planned IRS audit of EA has been cancelled.

© Amber Ferguson

This blog is solely a product of the author’s imagination. It is a spoof. It is fiction. It did not happen and is meant for entertainment purposes only. Please see the It’s a Spoof Page for more information.

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